.i think its almost stupid of you to ask me all this shit. dont do it anymore. what are you holding me back from is what i want to know. just say shit it all and go where yr insides dont feel all butchered up. its insane, but to me. right now. i couldnt give two shits if i see you tomorrow or if i see you in ten years. and i want to say that sometimes i fucked you so you would leave. cuz i knew you would go if i just laid there for a few minutes. and i couldnt stand yr fucking face anymore. i dont care. i.m such a crap version of me. i used to be hysterical and useless. now im just useless really. but fuck you i wont cry. fuck you . i.ll see you cry and i.ll have that over you. and you said i.m cold. i say detached. i say bastard version of who i was. but that.s a blessing you know. to be a BASTARD. cuz you can do anything. everyone already finds you shit. so don.t come to me next time. please dont come to me. i dont get off on christian sex / alcohol-induced closeness / stock conversation / static / banker by day.pseudo punk by night / a day at the zoo / bad cinema / mtv defined music / the five o'clock news / absolutes / jokes / national bestsellers / HTML kicking my ass / ratings / corporate sponsorship / radios top ten / sports / women who insist on killing our progress (fuck you jennifer lopes. britney spears. christina aguileira. its not freedom. dont you fucking get it? *you can.t wipe out all our progress with yr little cotton ball* slice and dice your face to perfection* slip up a word and down you fall * teeth are capped, lipo-sucked * hair is set and nose is contoured * tummys tucked and boobs are lifted* uncross your legs and your pantyhose shifted * am i smiling enough? * am i smiling too much? * am i tucked in and buckled, do my tits touch? * hi how are you? how high are you * less teeth and more tits - its never enough * you got less teeth and more tits * what a buch of hypocrites, trying to change the world * bonded tooth smilestravel so many miles* how you gonna change the world? * i wanna see something else * why wont you show me something else -- / i think i was saying something. i think i was trying to say No. thats not cool in my book. but i.ll just stop now cuz it really makes no fucking difference. does it piss anyone off that honest working people. oh fucking forget it.